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Does taking a shower count?

The importance of self-care is well-known. There is absolutely no doubt about the restorative power of putting yourself first for a few hours and focusing on relaxing, reflecting, & appreciating the essence of your badass self. And, in case there was any question, busy bloggers and influencers everywhere tout the power of taking time outs, and share pics of their staycations/flower baths/spa days like it’s going out of style.

But how do you practice self-care when your constant companions are two babies with big needs that literally never end? When your partner works 13 hours a day and comes home full of love but low on energy? When going to the bathroom or taking a shower isn’t even something you can do alone because – hello, you have a toddler! When taking even 5 minutes to yourself gives your toddler just enough time to feed your newborn his banana or cover him with his blanket, like, literally from head to toe?

I’m still trying to figure it out; I haven’t even been able to leave the house without an extra set of hands, and can’t be away from my boobie-barnacle for too long. But the small ways in which I am able to practice it have been monumental. Eating well, even when I don’t feel like it or have the time. Stretching out the co-sleeping kinks from the night before and taking time to breathe. Accepting invitations to see friends, even though I smell like milk, still can’t form full sentences, and putting myself together to look semi-functional is out of the question. But more importantly – and this is a new one for me – I’ve decided to practice self-care by actually caring for myself and watching what I say.

Being a mom to two under two is hard and makes me feel out of sorts and overwhelmed most of the time. I lose my temper with my toddler, wish my newborn was more like his brother at this age, and get annoyed easily while running on little sleep and being on high alert. Instead of being hard on myself at the end of the day and wondering if I’m really cut out for all of this or just the worst mom ever, I’ve decided to be kind to myself and instead say, “you did the best you could at the time, and tomorrow you will do better.”

Try it out, busy mama, and feel good that you’re investing in some major self-care. It may not be instagram-worthy, but it’s definitely the cool thing to do.

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